I was making some tuna noodle crap for dinner and the rest of the family was watching Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood on the DVR. Every now and then, Tori’s friend Mehran (her gay husband) would throw out some funny observation about his gayness or other people’s gayness. I don’t usually pay attention to gay people talking about their gayness (because I just don’t give a crap) except my ears did perk up a tad when I heard Mehran exclaim to Tori and Dean that they had a gay baby.
At first my daughter seemed more excited about the fact that little Liam kissed an Asian baby (because she’s all about Asians now – thanks, Delilah). But after the two little babies gave each other a peck, Mehran felt it was absolutely necessary to declare on a national level that Tori and Dean had a gay baby. Or was it more like, “OH MY GOD, YOU HAVE A GAAAAAY BABYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Yeah, it was probably more like that.
So, okay. I thought that was a little weird. And it wasn’t a few seconds later while I was stirring my tuna noodle crap (and wondering how truly crappy it was going to taste) that I felt a slight tug on my left side. I turned to see my daughter staring at me with that I’ve-got-something-to-ask-you look on her face.
Her: What does it mean when they say you’re gay?
Um…..(phew)…well, um…yeah, how do I answer this? Take a deep breath, Dena, because just last week didn’t you convince her to stop laughing about the fact that boobies are a food source? And didn’t you explain to her that some babies come from a mommy’s belly (because, technically, she was born via c-section and came directly from my belly) and then thanked your lucky stars that she didn’t ask about the rest of the babies that don’t come from a mommy’s belly?
Suck it up, Mom!! You can do this! Sure, she’s almost 8 years old, and at the rate kids are growing up these days, it’s very possible she’ll be asking for a bra and starting her period in the next two years and then you’ll really have some ‘splainin’ to do!
Me: Well, sometimes boys fall in love with boys and girls fall in love with girls.
Me: Usually you hear about boys falling in love with girls, right?
Her: Yeah. So why do they get a special word?
Me: Uh…I don’t know. Here, you want some ice cream?
It was that easy. But almost immediately, I thought it was strange that my daughter had asked me about the gay word before she’s even asked me about the sex word. Then I realized that most people who are gay probably recognize that within/about themselves before they even start dealing with the sexual aspect. And I actually prefer it that way. At least now Elle knows that people just fall in love with people. But I am sooo dreading the sex talk.