The other day I received some really good news.
While there is a bigger picture here, at the moment I can only write about it in bits and pieces. This year has been bursting with an ample amount of progress only to be followed by the kinds of setbacks that usually accompany big, big wishes. This is the reason I accept the little victories with caution.
Matt and I have learned all too well how the good things we work so hard for come with strings attached. I guess, in a way, I have always known this, considering the weight I have carried alone for the past ten years. And I do remember warning Matt about what I like to call “the circus coming to town” when it was determined that he and I would be pairing together for this ride called marriage. But only when you’re swimming in it, or drowning in it, and trudging through the thick of it, do you realize how tightly those strings are bound to you. In some ways and on certain days, those strings feel like a noose.
The two of us – nay, the three of us (as Elle is aware of only the bigger picture) – are so fervently ready to move on with our lives. These strings that keep me tied to one place are starting to fray, ever so slowly. I suppose that’s a promising way to help balance the fragility of my frayed nerves, though I do believe in all the reasons why this process needs to hurry up already.
With that being said, Elle and I will be heading to Oklahoma City to be with Matt for a few weeks this summer. This adventure will ultimately become part of our bigger picture I mentioned before, and, with any luck, will help to determine how it all comes together. But for now, it is a little victory. Seeing as my first and only visit so far to the city was during Thanksgiving last year, a week blanketed in chilly rain and bitter cold wind, I am very much looking forward to getting to know Oklahoma City at her summery and sweltering best.
P.S. Waking up in the same time zone with the man I love? SUPER AWESOME BONUS POINTS!!!!!!!!!!!