Toad in a Frog

I have a plant container in the shape of a frog with a really huge mouth. That’s obviously where the plant is supposed to go but there are no drainage holes. Coincidentally, I have way too much experience with rotted plant roots and accidental drownings.

Instead, I ripped apart a piece of my geraniums and planted a separated stalk inside a small plastic container from the nursery and then stuck that inside the frog’s really huge mouth. It’s actually doing quite well.

Take a look for yourself!

frog in a frog

Uh, wait. Is that a toad…inside the frog?

Why, yes. Yes it is!

 IMGP3968-001

You know, I’m sure all toads look the same and it could have been the same one I discovered in my garden earlier this year (oh, and maybe it was the baby! – wishful thinking), but he did have an awfully smug expression on his face. He reminds me of a particular toad that was involved in what I believed at the time to be a toxin-squirting incident in my foyer a few years ago. That morning, I opened my front door and this gigantic jerk of a toad hopped in, flopped over on his back, and proceeded to squirt deadly poisons all over the place from his ass. I kid you not.

close up

Gigantic Jerk.

Concerned my stupid dog would lick it all up and die, I called the veterinarian as soon as I was able to escort the toad out my front door to be sure it wasn’t some deadly toxic blast. I’m sure the vet’s staff thought me to be a little nuts, but in what world does a toad just waltz his way into your house and proceed to pee deadly juices wherever he darn well pleases? And that’s exactly what it was, the vet assured me: Toad Pee.

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About Dena

I'm a suburban Clevelander by way of Oklahoma City, by way of North Florida, by way of Southern Maryland, by way of Upper Michigan, by way of Northern Italy, by way of Lower Michigan, by way of Texas. Because of living in so many places, I have something in common with almost everyone I meet. I love reading, writing, and American history (especially reading or writing about American history). I'm interested in culture of place, historical trauma, and writing about the kinds of histories most people don't know about.
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8 Responses to Toad in a Frog

  1. I didn’t know toads could produce toxic spray. I learned my new thing for today.

    • Dena says:

      There have been sightings of the invasive Cane toad here in North Florida. They can kill small animals. Of course, I panicked and immediately thought “CANE TOAD!” when it turned out to be a lil’ old garden toad.

  2. oolalang says:

    Hahaha–toad in a toad! SO meta! Glad he wasn’t dangerous. I heard about Cane Toads on a National Geographic show about Australia and they’re terrifying! I didn’t realize they were hear in the States too :-O

  3. Dena this is hilarious!

  4. Snicker, snicker on the frog. Put some small rocks under the pot you put inside the frog’s mouth and you shouldn’t have any problems with drowning.

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